by Jason Mraz
And all I really want from you is to feel me
As the feeling inside keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me
I think it might kill me
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Make You Feel My Love - Adele
When the rain
Is blowing in your face
And the whole world
Is on your case
I could offer you
A warm embrace
To make you feel my love
When the evening shadows
And the stars appear
And there is no - one there
To dry your tears
I could hold you
For a million years
To make you feel my love
I know you
Haven't made
Your mind up yet
But I would never
Do you wrong
I've known it
From the moment
That we met
No doubt in my mind
Where you belong
I'd go hungry
I'd go black and blue
I'd go crawling
Down the avenue
Know there's nothing
That I wouldn't do
To make you feel my love
The storms are raging
On the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret
The winds of change
Are blowing wild and free
You ain't seen nothing
Like me yet
I could make you happy
Make your dreams come true
Nothing that I wouldn't do
Go to the ends
Of the Earth for you
To make you feel my love, To make you feel my love
Is blowing in your face
And the whole world
Is on your case
I could offer you
A warm embrace
To make you feel my love
When the evening shadows
And the stars appear
And there is no - one there
To dry your tears
I could hold you
For a million years
To make you feel my love
I know you
Haven't made
Your mind up yet
But I would never
Do you wrong
I've known it
From the moment
That we met
No doubt in my mind
Where you belong
I'd go hungry
I'd go black and blue
I'd go crawling
Down the avenue
Know there's nothing
That I wouldn't do
To make you feel my love
The storms are raging
On the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret
The winds of change
Are blowing wild and free
You ain't seen nothing
Like me yet
I could make you happy
Make your dreams come true
Nothing that I wouldn't do
Go to the ends
Of the Earth for you
To make you feel my love, To make you feel my love
On whether there's a point
I am angry. I am so angry.
Very angry. Demn angry!
So mad. And frustrated.
And sad.
And sad.
I wish to retain, the anger.
I want to feel angry.
But anger not to the point
of indifference.
I don't want to, not care.
I just think that, anger is a good feeling.
Instead of frustration, sadness and disappointment.
Yes, anger is good.
But towards these two days,
its beginning to somewhat dim.
Sadness beginning to try to break through somehow.
Like last night even, especially when i am exhausted.
Like now. I am damn tired. Tried to sleep it off since
the last two hours, but i remain uptight.
And my mind is filled with thoughts.
Thoughts like dreams and hopes.
Thoughts that can make me really, really happy
and despair at the same time.
I was forewarned, or you can say reminded
by a friend that i might think that i'm the only one,
but you can't be certain.
You can't know that you are the only one in his life now.
I think of it to a more certain as i was reprimanded of
my behaviour. That what i do can undermine my value.
I was shocked.
That my value can be diminish.
That what i am doing can change his perception of me.
Where i hold him at my highest regard.
Where even with all his weaknesses and behaviour,
he is still the one for me.
That his value never lowered just because
of what he thinks, how he acts and what he does.
He is still the one for me.
He is still the one for me.
But why do i feel that i am still, on a test.
That he is judging me, rating me, valuing me,
to see whether i am the one for him.
Gosh, i was very, i can't find the words to express it,
terribly sad, and crying silently.
So effing dramatic, but true.
I have lost the sense of security and trust towards him
from that moment onwards. I feel that all
the trust and love i have built for him,
towards him has diminish. Dimmed.
And i think that, for now, no matter what
i will try to do to fix it,
it's now up to him to regain back my trust,
and love.
The only question is, whether he loves me
enough to do that.
Very angry. Demn angry!
So mad. And frustrated.
And sad.
And sad.
I wish to retain, the anger.
I want to feel angry.
But anger not to the point
of indifference.
I don't want to, not care.
I just think that, anger is a good feeling.
Instead of frustration, sadness and disappointment.
Yes, anger is good.
But towards these two days,
its beginning to somewhat dim.
Sadness beginning to try to break through somehow.
Like last night even, especially when i am exhausted.
Like now. I am damn tired. Tried to sleep it off since
the last two hours, but i remain uptight.
And my mind is filled with thoughts.
Thoughts like dreams and hopes.
Thoughts that can make me really, really happy
and despair at the same time.
I was forewarned, or you can say reminded
by a friend that i might think that i'm the only one,
but you can't be certain.
You can't know that you are the only one in his life now.
I think of it to a more certain as i was reprimanded of
my behaviour. That what i do can undermine my value.
I was shocked.
That my value can be diminish.
That what i am doing can change his perception of me.
Where i hold him at my highest regard.
Where even with all his weaknesses and behaviour,
he is still the one for me.
That his value never lowered just because
of what he thinks, how he acts and what he does.
He is still the one for me.
He is still the one for me.
But why do i feel that i am still, on a test.
That he is judging me, rating me, valuing me,
to see whether i am the one for him.
Gosh, i was very, i can't find the words to express it,
terribly sad, and crying silently.
So effing dramatic, but true.
I have lost the sense of security and trust towards him
from that moment onwards. I feel that all
the trust and love i have built for him,
towards him has diminish. Dimmed.
And i think that, for now, no matter what
i will try to do to fix it,
it's now up to him to regain back my trust,
and love.
The only question is, whether he loves me
enough to do that.
Monday, November 28, 2011
Which one is better?
I wonder which emotions is better to feel.
Whether its sad or anger.
I feel angry now.
When slightly second before that
all i am feeling is worried, sad, restless,
disappointed.
Yes, definitely not positive feelings.
I wonder also, when did i last feel happy.
Like, truly happy.
I think there was this one day last week,
when i did.
It was when i ate lunch with some
close-friends colleague.
And that's rare.
You know, when you're one in your crappy mood,
when all you want to do is sleep and dream,
cos somehow dreams are better than reality,
and when you wake up in the morning,
you feel so down, dark, sad, energy-less,
and laugh seems foreign to your face muscle,
and smile is somehow forbidden.
Like, i don't deserve to be happy.
Why am i in this crappy mood?
Whereas i shouldn't!
I think i just lost it, once, yet again.
That motivation, that burning sensation
that pushes me towards my goals,
that strong feeling inside me that
beckons me to live.
I've lost it again, yet, once again.
I have lost it two years ago.
And found it after i was hospitalized.
I went bungee-jump and after that,
everything escalates and went positive.
I even started a relationship this year.
And, now its escalating downwards yet again.
And its spiralling down slowly.
I tried to stop it.
I travel. I met new people.
I try to become less worried.
I try to find new passion.
I try to do new projects.
I try to be nicer to the people that i'm not fond of.
I tried everything and i did all those stuff
mentioned above. I did all that i can do.
And i do pray to God.
But it seems to no avail and pointless.
Cos, in the end, no matter how many small goals
i tried to set and achieved,
nothing seems so pointless and time wasting
as i have only one goal.
I have made up my mind years ago on that goal
and its stuck with me until now.
I guess that is why i am restless.
Because for all those efforts, prayers and let it go
that i have done,
it's seems not enough.
I thought that being in a relationship is all
i want. That he loves me back is enough.
It turns out that i learn that its not enough, for me.
I want more. I guess, i want security.
I want guarantee. I want him to be mine.
I want marriage, that sacred union between two people in love.
Even as i know marriage is not ultimate.
And there is no guarantee that it is forever,
i still want it.
I do question my motives of wanting it,
whether i want to because i am pressured into it, subconsciously.
Or i go with the flow where its time that i get married,
or simply because i want to start living my life with him beside me.
Yes, yes that's the reason.
I want to live my life with him beside me.
I do, am living my life now.
I do enjoy life with my family, relatives, friends and acquaintances.
But somehow, its not the same, without him.
He is at the back of my mind in everything i do.
And i just want him. Yes, i want him.
So what do i do now?
I just need to hold on to my anger,
and remember this feeling so that
i can stay away from him,
and start to let go, because
if i don't learn to love,
like God intended humans to feel
true love,
than i am not ready.
I need to learn to Love.
Whether its sad or anger.
I feel angry now.
When slightly second before that
all i am feeling is worried, sad, restless,
disappointed.
Yes, definitely not positive feelings.
I wonder also, when did i last feel happy.
Like, truly happy.
I think there was this one day last week,
when i did.
It was when i ate lunch with some
close-friends colleague.
And that's rare.
You know, when you're one in your crappy mood,
when all you want to do is sleep and dream,
cos somehow dreams are better than reality,
and when you wake up in the morning,
you feel so down, dark, sad, energy-less,
and laugh seems foreign to your face muscle,
and smile is somehow forbidden.
Like, i don't deserve to be happy.
Why am i in this crappy mood?
Whereas i shouldn't!
I think i just lost it, once, yet again.
That motivation, that burning sensation
that pushes me towards my goals,
that strong feeling inside me that
beckons me to live.
I've lost it again, yet, once again.
I have lost it two years ago.
And found it after i was hospitalized.
I went bungee-jump and after that,
everything escalates and went positive.
I even started a relationship this year.
And, now its escalating downwards yet again.
And its spiralling down slowly.
I tried to stop it.
I travel. I met new people.
I try to become less worried.
I try to find new passion.
I try to do new projects.
I try to be nicer to the people that i'm not fond of.
I tried everything and i did all those stuff
mentioned above. I did all that i can do.
And i do pray to God.
But it seems to no avail and pointless.
Cos, in the end, no matter how many small goals
i tried to set and achieved,
nothing seems so pointless and time wasting
as i have only one goal.
I have made up my mind years ago on that goal
and its stuck with me until now.
I guess that is why i am restless.
Because for all those efforts, prayers and let it go
that i have done,
it's seems not enough.
I thought that being in a relationship is all
i want. That he loves me back is enough.
It turns out that i learn that its not enough, for me.
I want more. I guess, i want security.
I want guarantee. I want him to be mine.
I want marriage, that sacred union between two people in love.
Even as i know marriage is not ultimate.
And there is no guarantee that it is forever,
i still want it.
I do question my motives of wanting it,
whether i want to because i am pressured into it, subconsciously.
Or i go with the flow where its time that i get married,
or simply because i want to start living my life with him beside me.
Yes, yes that's the reason.
I want to live my life with him beside me.
I do, am living my life now.
I do enjoy life with my family, relatives, friends and acquaintances.
But somehow, its not the same, without him.
He is at the back of my mind in everything i do.
And i just want him. Yes, i want him.
So what do i do now?
I just need to hold on to my anger,
and remember this feeling so that
i can stay away from him,
and start to let go, because
if i don't learn to love,
like God intended humans to feel
true love,
than i am not ready.
I need to learn to Love.
Saturday, November 5, 2011
The One That Got Away
3rd song of hers (Katy Perry) that i love other than Teenage Dreams and Thinking of You;
"The One That Got Away"
Summer after high school when we first met
We make out in your Mustang to Radiohead
And on my 18th Birthday
We got matching tattoos
Used to steal your parents' liquor
And climb to the roof
Talk about our future
like we had a clue
Never planned that one day
I'd be losing you
In another life
I would be your girl
We keep all our promises
Be us against the world
In another life
I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away
I was June and you were my Johnny Cash
Never one without the other we made a pact
Sometimes when I miss you
I put those records on
Someone said you had your tattoo removed
Saw you downtown singing the Blues
Its time to face the music
I'm no longer your muse
And in another life
I would be your girl
We keep all our promises
Be us against the world
In another life
I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away
The o-o-o-o-o-one [x3]
The one that got away
[Bridge:]
All this money can't buy me a time machine (Nooooo)
Can't replace you with a million rings (Nooooo)
I shoulda told you what you meant to me (Woooooow)
Cause now I pay the price
In another life
I would be your girl
We keep all our promises
Be us against the world
In another life
I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away
The o-o-o-o-o-one [x3]
In another life
I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away
"The One That Got Away"
Summer after high school when we first met
We make out in your Mustang to Radiohead
And on my 18th Birthday
We got matching tattoos
Used to steal your parents' liquor
And climb to the roof
Talk about our future
like we had a clue
Never planned that one day
I'd be losing you
In another life
I would be your girl
We keep all our promises
Be us against the world
In another life
I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away
I was June and you were my Johnny Cash
Never one without the other we made a pact
Sometimes when I miss you
I put those records on
Someone said you had your tattoo removed
Saw you downtown singing the Blues
Its time to face the music
I'm no longer your muse
And in another life
I would be your girl
We keep all our promises
Be us against the world
In another life
I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away
The o-o-o-o-o-one [x3]
The one that got away
[Bridge:]
All this money can't buy me a time machine (Nooooo)
Can't replace you with a million rings (Nooooo)
I shoulda told you what you meant to me (Woooooow)
Cause now I pay the price
In another life
I would be your girl
We keep all our promises
Be us against the world
In another life
I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away
The o-o-o-o-o-one [x3]
In another life
I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Labels
Why is it you are always looking for definitions? You're only satisfied when you're given a label you can stick onto things. I love you. It's as simple as that.
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