10 More Quotes to Express How I Feel, Now

1) The best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. #ihatequotes

2) If you see me as 'just a friend' why would I stick around and waste all my love on you?

3) It's really sad when someone gets hurt so much that they can say "oh well, I'm used to it." I'm afraid that i will be me.

4) If you don't want me now, I won't want you later.

5) I'm okay being alone... I just don't like feeling alone, that's the worst. And i do feel alone, when i'm not with you.

6) Smile doesn't always mean "I'm happy". Sometimes.. "I can handle it". In most case: "I'm tired of crying".

7) I show my love through actions, not words.

8) The keyword to your relationship: TR(US)T. Without no trust, there is no US.

9) A girl can talk to many guys, but it takes a special guy to have her greet good morning and wish good night to.

10) Giving up is always an option, but it's never my choice.

Well, maybe 15.

11) Decisions are the hardest to make when its a choice between where you should be and where you want to be.

12) I'm sorry, I don't think you're the one for me... I *know* you are.

13) #perempuansexybila they are wearing their boyfriend's shirt without any make up on.

14) I love you, but sometimes I just wish I don't.

15) The harder you try to forget something, the more you think about it subconsciously.

That's why i'm writing.

10 Quotes to Express Me

1) When someone is too busy for you, it makes you feel not special.

2) I don't feel it anymore. Does this mean the pain is gone or am I just too used to it?

3) It seems like you have harder feelings for somebody after a relationship, than while you're in the relationship.

4) Sometimes you gotta listen to your brain, just to save your heart.

5) Just because I’m always here for you, doesn’t mean you can take me for granted.

6) I'm a girl. I don't smoke, drink, or party every weekend. I don't sleep around or start drama to get attention. Yes, we still do exist.

7) Do I really love him, or am I addicted to the pain of wanting something I can't have?

8) In true love, there's no expectation of reciprocation. It's all about giving yourself without guarantee.

9) I'd rather have someone who shows they care, than someone who just says it.

10) The good memories hurt more than the bad ones do.

Am I Ready?

I regret it.

I regret the fact that when
he said, 'i rasa i dah
ready tok settle down',
i freak out, wouldn't
meet him in his eyes,
and keep on talking as
if he never said anything.
Twice.

I regret that.
Cos now, i don't know
how to approach the subject.

Like, should i
'Laling, ingat tak u penah
cakap ari tu, pasal...'

Or, 'Laling, i am ready.'

Ready for what?

Sigh.

I want to explain why
i freaked out.

I know some of my close
friends were like,
how come you freak out?
i thought this is what you want?
bla bla bla.. yeah yeah.

I thought so too.

But i freaked out.
Period.

So, i guess i wasn't ready
as i thought i was.

But after the event,
the day after, i sit
on the subject and
ponder.

And think to myself
hey, i am ready.

I have been ready
since i realise that
i fell in love
with him on 22 April 2008.

He is the only guys i
could think of of saying YES
when he ask (not if).

I remembered all the guys
that have asked me before.
I remembered mostly Rizal.
He was then, my number 2
guy. Number one, of course has
and always been my bf la.

When Rizal approached
the marriage subject, there
was no hesitation and doubt
in my mind to say No.

But whenever i imagine
my bf asking me, i am certain
and know whole heartedly,
without a doubt
that my answer is Yes.

So, yeah.
I am ready.
Truthfully said, i can't wait
to start living my life
with him.

I imagine it will be more
challenging and 'colourful'
and unpredictable than what
we are going through.

I mean, look at us. We
are two different person. But
we clicked. We challenge
each other, support each
other, love each other.
And understands each other.
Enough toleration and communication
and spunk. And annoyance
and irritation and ego too.

What's the reason for me
to settle down?

Cos i am head over heels
in love with him?

YES.

Cos i know he is the one?

YES.

Cos he is my prince charming?

YES.

Cos he is the perfect man for me?

YES.

Cos he can controls me, and i respect him and
try my best to accept him for who he is?

YES.

And yes, me and him,
we have this chemistry
that is totally undeniable.
Sparks actually surrounds us
and shoots across the room
and people around us reacts
to it.

Trust me, you have to be
there, to believe it!

Sigh, to be in love..

So, yes i am ready.

The fact that i don't know
how to cook, doesn't stop me.

The fact that i am not ready for
kids, doesn't deter me away.

The fact that i still treasure my freedom
and my alone time, doesn't change my mind at all.

The fact that i have lots more goals and dreams
to do, be achieve and grasp, doesn't deter my spirit.

I want to start living my life
together with him.

I am ready!

His Birthday, Part II

For his 28th birthday (this year), which
will be due in 3 more days,
i planned something.

Hell, of course i plan something.

The idea came on Monday 27th July (or was it Sunday)?
Oh well, so the idea came
spontaneously. I thought it over,
briefly but adamantly.
I make plans,
and execute them there and then.

So later that evening, i
went to Midvalley to check on
some lesson. To see
how much they charge and
the availability to teach me
in a short time (a week).

It was a success!
Love that place, and the guys (all guys)
in that shop. The owner (a chinese guy)
is very helpful and helped me
there and then.

My 'teacher' is a young guy name
Kautsar.
He's the sort of guy
you'd see in a band. Long curly hair that reaches
his shoulder. I think he is younger
than me. But i never asked.

Anyway, he has been very
helpful. He started teaching
me on Tuesday itself.
I came with nothing.
Luckily the shop provided
everything; from the lesson book
to the music instrument to
the small stuff.

First lesson was good. It gives me
motivation to continue.

Then i was busy, super busy
with my office's performance.
We had dikir barat practice every
evening starting wed. i was rushing
on wed with my office work, dikir
barat practice, lesson and my own
private tutors.

thursday was even hectic.
we got dikir barat practice the
whole day cos the farewell dinner
for dato pbk is at night.
so between practice, i rush to midvalley
during lunch hour for the music lesson.

in the end, the dikir barat
was a success!

i was exhausted.

firday came, and i didnt have
my music lesson, although i had tutors
and such. i practiced a couple of hours that
night until i figured that i
should stop as not to angered my neighbours
with the sumbang sound i made.

saturday, i have something in malacca during
the day. a 'bapakku kawen lagi' themed
wedding. during the night, music lesson and practices.
the last one before my sunday
recording.
wow, i was really in it. and at the same time
scared and know, that i am soooo not ready.
(met key and kc there)

sunday came, i had to teach
in the afternoon. after that
i rush to wangsamaju area where
the hotsound studio is located. its
a jamming studio. memang best!
i got lost but managed to arrive on time, 4pm.

my videographer, remy was also there.
you see, there was only the 2 of us.
i did invite some friends, but none showed up.
i was a bit, down but in a way i think
its better that none showed up though.

i was horrible. we did a 5 takes. going through
the song from beginning until the end.
(did i mention i love the studio?)

i told remy, you used what you have and
do whatever you can to save my video.
make it a funny one, since i can't really
perform as well as i wanted to.

ahfa came later, rather late, but still
i am grateful that he did came.
we lepak for half an hour at chawan bangsar then,
before i head to Plan B Bangsar Village for
dinner with my two gf;s Al and Chena.

Overall, life is good. I can't wait to see
the end product. Although i can expect
something sweet, cute and yet funny in the
video.

Laling, i hope you love it.
And i hope you know how much
i love you.